Keshathra Part 1, Chapter Eight

****George****

She threw me to the basement floor. "Anything you want from me , you take." I promise her as I begin to clamor to my feet."Yes, and i intend to take from you a choice. What is my Name?" Barely standing I took a lunge to her midsection grunting "Fucking Bitch". Before I could make contact she gracefully swung her hip back and I face-palmed the cement , then her heel ground into my spine.
"Yes, true. But not any of the names you are to chose from."

She wrenched me to my feet and walked me backward into the whipping post.
'wait a min... i am facing the wrong way...' my restrained arms tense with certain realisation, when she locked her coal glare on me. My head sinks back into the post, then whispers oh holy fuck.... as if a prayer to get me outta this.

She moved savagely, and whipped the virgin flesh of my chest and stomach with a cat of nines. At first I raged and promised to hurt her, then I began to bargain and retracted myself, then I begged and pleaded, then I fell into surrender, and absorbed her blows with out thinking anymore. And she stopped, cleaned her tool, and returned it to the armour next to us. And sat at her desk, leaving me to wait while she smoked a cigarette in her thunderous silence.

"Are you going to come and sit in this chair so we can talk properly, or do I continue?" I grunt my compliance, she releases me and ever so slowly make my way to the desk. After she sits facing me our conversation begins.

"Please Explain to me how it is the you think you are reformed?"
My mind stirred from the smog, racing to find evidence of my changed ...but I kept stammering there... "it was cause I love Sam... Ill be good because I love Sam but then they kept me in."
"I think your rage is because things did not go as you wished. George Wisenbugh Does not like it when he is out of control. But can you even really sit there and tell me that you wouldn't or haven't broken any laws since Sam? In your anger with the system,You violated the minds of 2 others reformers, can you even be trusted to restrain your insanity because of love?"

"It's been known to happen, mastermistressmadamormaam. For the relationship a person would give up large tracks of themselves."
"Yes true. And their LIVING partner likewise suppresses a multitude of self , and they fill each other's void. Most often in Fairy Stories George. But what you have going on... they write about in Horrors. Your love cannot fill any void except fantasy. And even that, is unsatisfying. Part of you knows very well , George, that the spirit of Sam you so cherish, you have shamed again and again."

I am crushed...I begin to feel violent and then I went back into surrender, and absorbed her reason... and then I felt pain, self disgust, fear.....hurt, I broke tearfully. "what am I then, just a criminal?"
"You are a man, George, possessed of talents and skills that are very valuable to the State." She stated flatly. I was intrigued, and open. She smiled tauntingly when I asked her what was valuable about me?
"First I , as Reformer, secure your respect and honer of my teaching. Then I can guide you to freedom."
"Tell me what I can do that's so valuable?"
"Who knows the system and the people with in it, and the letter of the law better then George Wiesnburg?
I sat back weighting my options, my body was a flame of crimson lashes, and I suddenly didn't want to battle wills anymore. I had to concede my errors and loss.
"How do I show you my honer, MasterMadamMistressOrMaam? My respect is not for free."
"Nor is mine, What is my name, George?" I steel my eyes to hers and deliberately pronounce "Reformer." She drew on side of her lips into a crooked smile..."Acceptable. To prove your integrity you will give up your privilege of speech. I want you to observe, meditate, and find that quiet place in your mind as well. No plotting, No rebellion, just watch and evaluate. When you have figured out your valuable purpose in life, I will restore the right of speech to you.
"But until then..." She continued turning her smile back into her evil coy one." Because you are being punished for interrupting me in your bedroom, you will ware this cloth over your mouth. Only move it for eating and hygiene form here on out, do you comply?"

"Yes Reformer." and Bowed my head, as she tied it on, and dismissed me.