Keshathra Part 1, Chapter Seventeen

***Jerry***

Four hours had past, my breakfast plate sat cold on my night stand. Funny no one woke me about lunch. I gingerly limped to my door, and heard nothing but the faint sound of a sander in the garage. The need for a cigarette was driving me to get myself dressed for the day.
I stole a glance at my crusted streaks, 30 lashes.
30.... 30?

I didn't even know how to begin to imagine the gravity of my mistakes.
" At least they didn't need stitching." I minimised, gliding my shirt on as painlessly as possible. Flashbacks ....

'i cant believe that you'd twist his triumph into torment. How could you destroy ..."
I said something like that I think... but what for? I didn't even know what happened? I was just so angry at the thought of him being called out. I thought she went psycho. I thought....

As I set my foot tenderly on the second step attempting to go down, came a word to my senses. "No" There was a nervous trimmer, an incredulous giggle, and an other attempt. "No"
"Bullshit." I snort to the ceiling. " I am loosing my mind. It's guilt talking." And a third attempt. "So help me Jerry."
I tripped stepping back, lost my balance and landed on my ass, sending shock waves of pain and grimacing up my back, haste was made to my banishment.

"oh gawd ... oh my farkin gawd" I paced pulling at my hair ....

she is my reformer too...

*** Diana***

I was so happy George was back. He asked me if I wanted to help him work on his car. Basically I kept him in cold drinks, fitting tools, and spend my time thinking about my future.

The war was entering a round of peace talks, border disputes. I wondered where my father's unit was. Once I tried to convince Mistress that I ought to be given an exception to the rule of no familial contact during reformation. But she asked me if I thought I was the only prisoner to ever irrevocably lose opportunity due to their mistakes. What made my case special?

That was like a stab in the heart. Since then I have been wondering if there was a way to find and get away with contacting my sister. And the only one who might have a clue how is pulling dents on the side of the car. I smiled at him flirtatiously all afternoon.(insert C)

   " What do you think it would be like to be a reformer?" He asked me, as he dropped the front tire. "I never thought about it. I think it would maybe be stressful. Its like intense baby sitting only I have to do what your parents couldn't.  " I said.  George wagged his head. " See that's how you would see it because your mad at authority. But the classic veiw of reformation is to induce self respect, and guide the prisoner toward self mastery."  He explained.

"Why do they have to send us away to do that? Why do we have to be punished and live by strict rules. Rules don't work. I mean if they did that all the free people under laws and stuff would be reformed and crime would end. So no more reformers needed. "  Yeah George agreed, continuing " But we have free choice... or maybe the whole world is the prison and inside reformation is the way out. Reformers always needed.  I mean we learn to look at ourselves out of context. I think being a reformer would be a terribly powerful thing. Having freedom to utterly mind fuck someone to have them unlearn the pressures the world outside of this house put on them. Pressures that led us to what ever law we broke to get us in here. " he paused a while to assess the next step of the repair job. and went on. " So that means, when we have so called "reformed" we will have a different training. If we are trained to be true to ourselves and etc and all good and noble ideals then find you have made a better citizen. But if you yourself are an ego infested fool, then how terrible the trainings you could induce."


 We made banter about the reform school and reforming. And we shared humor... if you did that then I'd do this to you and there was laughing and instead of just being drink barrier I actually got to work on the car.

By evening he was applying the finial coat of shine and we wrapped up. Mistress had been home for hours but told us she'd take care of supper we should get the job finished.

**** Jerry****

An agonizing four more hours passed which I spend filling my waste basket with crumpled death warrants. I quivered when the front door closed my heart whooshed in my ears.

Nothing happened. I began to relax, and stare at a blank sheet of paper.

If I had a joint I'd be able to write this thing. If I had a cigarette I'd be able to calm down hell if I had some food I might be able to get this stupi ... no....

Damn it... I slammed my fist down on the table and got a splinter for it. And meandered myself to the bathroom for the first aid kit.

***George***

My friend looked rough indeed. Reformer made a casserole and I brought it too him. I asked her for a little mercy for my sake and could I bring him a cigarette and eat dinner with him and she allowed.
" I don't know what I am going to say." He whines relieved for mother nicotine. I press my lips together because I didn't have an answer either.
" Jerry, maybe it is simple. Like ' mistress i screwed up i am sorry.' You do tend to make everything a major event Jerry."
"I feel so hurt that I challenged her. I completely questioned her authority in front of Diana. I respect her and I lost my mind at her how did I do that?" He begged.

"Maybe... it was, complacency."


                                                   (Insert B)


                                             *****Diana*****

        One the second night of Jerry's banishment Mistress Carol had been called out to the school directly after supper.  G and I where fairly bored, there wasn't much to talk about except to wonder how Jerry would pull through.  We sat at the kitchen table, he with a book about Reformation Law, and I glancing curiously on as I wound a new unruly yarn ball.  I thought that George would be bragging or even pensive over his best friend being in his own mental  Carol induced hell.  

    But he just sat there, every now and then donning a sly questioning grin toward the ceiling.  I tried not to notice but, it was that very familiar face that Mistress makes when she is handing out judgments.  It was very uncomfortable.

     "George you look a freak, what are you thinking about?"  I said. He cocked his head toward me, looking sure of himself. " I am pretty sure I know how to help you with your little dilema, D. And we won't get caught. "  bantered he.  After a moment of stilled wonder, I cocked my head incredulously in return. "Not possible." as I shrugged returning to the winding yarn.

   "Why do you think so?" he questioned. I set the yarn down in my lap. " Well, lets see. Go to the phone and try to call for pizza."  He sat back and giggled knowing full well that the phone only calls Emergency, Mistress's School office, and the salve abuse hotline.  I really didn't question why I suppose I assumed that because it was a reformer's house the lines where rigged by the system. But George found out one night. 

    It was the second day he was here that he wanted to call a Gardner, see if he could get some pay later or trade deal going. He had it all worked out too. He was going to tell the garner about his great marketing skills and promised that if the gardener would come do the work George would teach him how to increase his business. It would be like getting paid by five others for free work for education.  So after Mistress left that morning, more precisely just as soon as the shop opened, he picked up the phone and dialed.

   A young man answered. "You have reached the secretary at the desk of your Mistress Carol. The Commandant is not in at the moment but does suggest that you do not try calling out again, do your own work." Click.  and his face blanched as the reciever termbled onto the phone.  After standing stunned a moment George regained his humor and sat on the couch. "ok" he knodded outloud.

    No doubt he was sitting at this table remembering that moment also, so I joined him in laughing. Then he again regained his humor. " No D, I got it this time."  

   Then in grand demonstration he walked over to the kitchen door and turned the handle, which didn't surprise me when it did not open.  "See I mocked,   and remember every time we swear "somehow" we get injured." I continue knowing everything there was to know about this shit cell.

        "Yes, all signs of intelligent design.  What was the name of the house again?" George questioned me....but he wasnt looking at me he was thinking to the ceiling.  and started to snap his fingers  going on" ummm Tom,.... Dick... Harry?  you got a Harry dick.....Oh yeah Peter!" He announced with athority. The sound f him saying the name of th ehosue made my heart stammer and i felt really paranoid and watched.  

        George kept his hand on the door handle and spoke. "Sometimes it is about letting reformees make their own mistakes, and sometimes it is about minding your own business, and sometimes, Sir, it is about wanting to know if your student will have known that I ever left the house." and then he steped away and bowed his head toward the door.

         It clicked.